By Aria Garrett, Copy Editor
On March 2 at 7 p.m., members of the Vashon community assembled to the call of McMurray student Ella Yarkin’s bagpipes at the Vashon Island High School Theater.
They talked about death.
It was the first event in a weekend series of activities that highlighted different aspects of living and dying. The series featured a gallery cruise, a cemetery tour, storytelling and dinner.
“Ninety percent of Americans say it’s important to discuss their wishes for end of life care — yet 30 percent actually do so,” the website for A Vashon Conversation for the Living About Dying states. “We want Vashon to be the community where we ALL engage in these important conversations.”
The keynote speaker was Michael Hebb, founder of the “Death over Dinner” project. From sharing meaningful moments with his sister, to witnessing Paul Kagame, the President of Rwanda, to discussing genocide with former President of Ireland Mary Robinson, Hebb has learned the importance of dinner conversations.
His project thus far has visited over 30 countries, benefitting more than 100,000 people. He believes that dinner can and should be effectively used as a “modern symposium” for people to communicate sensitive topics, including mortality.
“In my experience people are afraid of dying, but [they] aren’t afraid to talk about death,” Hebb said.
A group of Vashon volunteers put this to the test at another event on March 4, when they hosted a meal at the Burton Lodge, following the guidelines on the “Death over Dinner” website. Over 100 tickets were sold.
“We called it ‘A Great Big Family Dinner,’ and it felt like it!” Carol Spangler, a hospice and event volunteer, said.
The dinner split the group into smaller tables and discussed questions such as “Does death feel like an end or beginning?” and “How would you want your own death to be?”
According to Spangler, these kinds of seemingly-adult questions should also be considered by young people, whether while mourning someone’s passing, coping with an illness or injury, or just trying to figure out how to live life.
“No matter how old you are, it’s helpful to be thinking about the fact that you’re not going to be here forever,” Spangler said. “What’s the meaning to my life, and what sort of value have I added?”